“Honesty is the best policy.” Usually.

Whether you’re a buyer or seller, everyone appreciates honesty and plain dealing when it comes to advertising a horse for sale. Much better to be straightforward and put all information out in the open … but sometimes, especially when you’re trawling Craigslist, that honesty can be a little overwhelming.

Let’s just dive right in with this honest-to-goodness ad submitted by Stephanie: “Good luck to the trainer!”

Screenshot via Facebook

This ad is perhaps a little less forthcoming, but still begs a good question from Morgan: “You have to thin out your herd so you bred 5 broodmares?”

Screenshot via Craigslist

Reg Quarter horses for sale. I have 9 quarter horses and need to thin the herd. We have an 18 month old palomino filly 750$, an 8 yr old palomino mare that is a good trail horse 1250$, a 7 yr old dunalino stallion, and 5 broodmares all bred for next yr.
These are all foundation bred King, Poco Bueno, and Mr San Peppy horses.
I will trade for anything of value except other horses. I can text pics

That’s not what that word means … and yet, it oddly works. Submitted by Julie: “I like their creative use of the word ‘user’.”

Screenshot via Facebook

Another honest ad which reveals this pony’s true charming self. (And unique breed — the rare and highly-coveted Welch Mounting pony.) Submitted by Morgan:

Screenshot via Craigslist

Pistol, is a Welch Mounting Pony! He is not for a beginner! He is 15 yrs old and about 13-14 hands high! He rides best with another horse. When riding by himself he will argue with you (he will rear, and side step) also his rearing is a trick but he knows his que to do it but he does do it on his own at times because you make him act right. he could go English or Barrels I’ve showed him both before. He’s great with other horses and easy keeper. Trade for a buckskin about 15 hands and around 10 years old that’s broke and has potential for roping. TRADE ONLY for a buckskin or palomino with potential to be a reining or roping horse
Prefer Text

When quality doesn’t work, go for quantity instead! Submitted by Rachel:

Screenshot via Craigslist

A bird in the hand is … no, actually, there’s no way to interpret this one, submitted by Anna: “I think she means martingale … but it’s still a breastcollar.”

Screenshot via Facebook

Nope, it’s not Photoshop. Seriously, you can’t make this stuff up. From Fiona:

Screenshot via Craigslist

Beauty is a 8 year old Appaloosa/Paint Cross. She has been started with a great foundation and has been used in a lesson program, camp program and as a trail horse.. She is very elegant and smart! Great Trail riding horse, a “point and go” horse, she will go through, on, over, across or under anything! She will go all day long, very willing and responsive She will ride out by herself or with a group, gets along with other horses. No buck, rear or kick. Sound, safe and sane, she loves to please and is very friendly! First one to the fence! Really nice mare. She is easy to work with and a lot of fun, she has a great disposition and has natural curiosity. Been hauled to fun shows and does great. Great horse for a teenager. $2000

And we’ll close out with the ultimate honest ad, submitted by Maria. The original language was pretty far off the NSFW spectrum, but we think the censorship may make it funnier. Overall, this is actually a success story — these animals were rescued from a kill sale, and the rescue responsible is networking to find them a more suitable mule-knowledgeable home to ensure that they remain in good hands. To open up the rescue’s Facebook page in a new window, click the ad.

Screenshots via Facebook

Readers, if you run across an “interesting” ad in your Internet wanderings, send it our way! Email the link to [email protected]. Who knows – maybe you’ll help connect a horse with a safe, loving home. Go Riding.