Do You Love Your Horse Too Much?
Like, is that even a serious question? Indeed it is, or at least Laura Stopper Batts’ therapist THINKS it is. This was Laura’s response.
Top photo courtesy of Laura Stopper Batts.
In the middle of a session on a recent trip to my therapist she interrupted me and said, “I think you love your horse too much.” You can imagine my surprise and reaction. “Of course NOT! How can you love a horse too much?”
She decided to ask me a few questions and then illustrate how this could be a problem. She said if I answered “Yes” to these questions then my love for my horse is distorted and needs to be changed into a much healthier state. See how you do.
1. Does your social life and social media revolve around your horse? According to her if you only hang out with people who have horses or only post things about your horse to social media feeds, you might love your horse too much. She told me that we need time away from each other. She said that like any relationship, brief breaks can be good. You get a chance to miss each other. She told me to keep this in mind and spend time alone with my non-horsey human friends.
My Response: What? Where? And better still WHY????
2. Does your credit card have more charges for things for your horse than for you or your family? According to her when you spend $200 on shoes for your horse every month but your own shoes are 10 years old, you might love your horse too much. According to her if you stand in line for hours at the tack shop tent sale but whine when you have to stop and buy groceries for your family, you might love your horse too much. She said my priorities are mixed up, that my horse should not come before myself and my family.
My Response: I don’t like new shoes and I’m not out of carrots.
3. Do you believe you can’t live without your horse? If the very idea of your horse dying sends you into a tizzy, you might love your horse too much. What?! Don’t even say that! Then she told me that while it’s normal to not look forward to your horse dying, since most horse owners outlive their horses, you should have a healthy attitude about it. Therefore, too much fear about your horse’s death equals too much love.
My Response: Excuse me I need to wipe my eyes before I continue.
4. Do you talk about your horse every day in every conversation?If your daily conversations only include your horse then basically, your horse is the center of your universe and you might love your horse too much.
My Response: My horsey friends love to talk about horses and that’s who I spend my time with.
5. Do you think about your horse to the exclusion of everything else? If your horse is the first thing you think of in the morning and the last thing you think of at night, you might love your horse too much. According to my therapist, other things like your health, hygiene and job are important too. It might be time to get things into prospective and turn your life and love around.
My Response: My horse is my health, my horse doesn’t care if I smell and I only work to support my horse!
6. Are your relationships ever damaged because of your horse? If you find yourself defending your love for your horse or had people leave you over your horse, you might love your horse too much.
My Response: My horse is a better person than most people. Every person on this planet could really learn a lot from horses. My horse doesn’t judge me, will never double-cross me, doesn’t hold grudges, always comforts me in my troubles, appreciates me, and pretty much makes me feel whole. To me horses are a HEALTHY habit; they are an emotional release that keeps many of us from more harmful ways of dealing with life. If the happiness I find with my horse makes me crazy then I guess my therapist has got a client for life!
About the author: Laura Stopper Batts, MS, PAS is the Founder of Happy Horse Healthy Planet and The Equine Nutrition Nerd, equine consulting companies with a focus on the ultimate health of your horse and our planet. Laura is available for horse/farm consultations, as a speaker for educational seminars and club meetings, and for demos at expos or fairs. If you would like to contact Laura for more information, please visit her websites
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