What Your Favorite Horse TV Show Says About You

We all have our guilty pleasures when it comes to watching TV shows with horses in them. Now here’s a tongue-in-cheek look at what some of those guilty pleasures say about you.

My husband recently sent me a list from McSweeney’s called “What Your Favorite Classic Rock Band Says About You, Part Three.” I read parts one, two and three and they are all brilliant, and I highly recommend that once you are done reading this list, you go read them right now! But I think my favorite one was Jim Croce: you have worn only socks and sock garters to a nude beach.

This idea of what certain things say about you is incredibly applicable to the horse world as well. So, without further ado, here’s what your favorite horse tv show has to say about you: 

Heartland: you have a high tolerance for the sound of whinnying 

Free Rein: you’re an anglophile who has read too much Jane Austen

Bojack Horseman: you like your coffee black like your soul 

Gunsmoke: you have actually brought a knife to a gunfight

The Saddle Club: you were too much of a badass in sixth grade to admit that you really liked the Babysitter’s Club

Wildfire: you never really got over your love of Hanson

The Lone Ranger: you once dreamed of being a rock and roll drummer like Keith Moon or Ginger Baker

Horsin’ Around: you’ve been waiting your whole life to meet Mary Kate and/or Ashley Olsen

Ride: you’ve watched an awful lot of princess movies in your lifetime

Horseland: you own at least one piece of jewelry with a rhinestone-encrusted heart on it

Spirit Riding Free: you eat kale at least once a day

The Ponysitters Club: you were the weird kid who ate mac and cheese without utensils

Luck: you’ve baked a cake with a shiv in it

Caitlin’s Way: you never really got over “My So-Called Life” being cancelled after only one season 

Rough Diamond: your favorite band is the Pogues

The Adventures of the Black Stallion: your copy of Robinson Crusoe has a cracked spine

Mister Ed: you have a jar of peanut butter stashed under your bed for emergencies

What other TV shows can you think of? And what do they say about their viewers? Let us know in the comments.