Because you should never stop being a horse person.
Yay! It’s that time of year where we can play dress up and get rewarded with treats! Score!
Here are eight costumes to satisfy your inner equestrian.
1. The adult horse costume
For about $70 you can dress up as a chestnut horse with severely neglected hooves and a parrot mouth. Not only will you look like an average horse for sale on Craigslist, you also will be in the average Craigslist horse for sale pose: walking on your two back feet.
2. The adorable baby costume
Okay, even if you don’t like kids, you’ll want one just so you can dress them up in this adorable costume. Awwww!
3. The Grim Reaper horse
Oooh, so spooky! It would be better if it came with a manure fork sickle, you know, just to scare yourself that you’ll be shoveling crap even after death. There’s no escaping it.
4. Prepubescent Teen Unicorn costume
So cute, but a little risqué. That skirt is way above the knee. What would Sister Mary have to say about that?
5. This Kentucky Derby disaster
Yep, I definitely think this jockey is over the weight limit, but I’m sure the horse will be able to overcompensate since it’s not being weighed down with a girth.
6. The “I want you to think I’m sexy cowgirl, and not covered in manure” costume
Wow, all we can say is: that looks extremely uncomfortable to ride in and it sure will get chilly begging for treats on October 31st.
7. The “Equestrienne”
Ooh la la. Sounds so French and feminine: “equestrienne.” Nothing says “I’m a horse person” more than dressing up and carrying a crop.
8. The classic two-person horse costume
The only question: who of my friends can I convince to be the horse’s @$$?
Go Halloween. And go riding!