10 Questions Non-Equestrians Should Stop Asking

Look, you really don’t want to know the answers to a lot of these.

Yep, equestrians love to talk about their horses … at length. And when our friends, family, significant other or innocent bystander expresses a genuine interest, we’re flattered. But there are a few questions, for their own health and sanity, that they should never ask us again. Here are a few.

1. Do you love your horse more than me?

You really don’t want to know that answer.

2. What exactly is sheath cleaning?

Trust me, you don’t want to know.

3. How much do your horse’s shoes cost?

The answer will make you sick.

4. When will you be back from the barn?

Before 2015 ends, hopefully.

5. Why do you blindfold your horses in the summertime?

Seriously?!?!?!

6. Where do you put your horses in the winter?

We bring them in the house, and they sit in front of the fireplace. Duh.

7. How much do horses eat?

As much as you will feed them, and they’ll still be hungry.

8. How much does it cost to feed a horse?

Every penny you will make goes to feeding them.

9. Do you want to do something this weekend besides going to the barn?

Um, let me think about it. NO!

10. I want to buy a horse for my daughter, how much do I need?

Bill Gates’ salary, plus another million just for vet bills.

What would you add to the list? Shout out in the comments! Go riding!