Are you feeling the burn from a few weeks of No-Stirrup November? Biz Stamm has a few tongue-in-cheek ways you can Tom Haverford this weekend and “treat yo self.”
If you have been participating in No-Stirrup November chances are all your hard work has led to some serious lactic acid build up in a few targeted muscle groups — the legs and abdominals in particular. No pain, no gain, my friend! So if you are finding yourself unreasonably sore, but still have the need to conduct yourself as a functional human in your everyday life, here are a few strategies to sooth those aching muscles.
Bubble bath with some bubbly
Grab your favorite bubbly, scented surfactant, turn on some relaxing tunes, and let the warm water lull you into a state of serenity. Complete the experience with a glass of your favorite champagne or prosecco to tingle your taste buds and loosen up your muscles.
Massage and a nice pinot noir
Massages are magical experiences and can do wondrous things for aching bodies. Let the skilled hands of a masseuse manipulate your muscles and take away the pain caused by your stirrupless exploits. Don’t forget to pre-game prepare for this experience with a glass or two of a nice pinot noir, ya know, to loosen up your muscles.
A burger and fries with your favorite pint
Riding with no stirrups is a lot of calorie consuming, muscle straining work! As the great Tom Haverford would say, “treat yo self!” to a delicious meal that will replenish your energy stores and provide the protein you need to repair those actin/myosin filaments. Adding a nice cold pint of your favorite brew will of course help to numb the ecruciating pain! Why did you ever agree to this?! loosen up your muslcles.
Some light yoga with some hard cider
Stretch out those tight muscles with some easy, restorative yoga poses like downward dog, or child’s pose. Be sure to breathe and connect your mind to your body. Mind to Body: What have you done?! A nice glass of hard cider to funnel directly into your mouth when you inevitably find yourself immovable in corpse pose sip between poses will help loosen up your muscles.
Heck, just hit the single malt.
Who am I kidding. Everything hurts and we’re dying! Do whatever you need to do to cope this No-Stirrups November. Lucky me, a new distillery just opened up walking distance from my house! You’re just about halfway through and it will all be worth it in the end when come out of this ordeal riding better than ever.
Horse Nation wants to remind you to drink responsibly this No-Stirrups November.