The rest of America can binge-watch our collective guiltiest pleasure and plan all the ways they can add subway tile and shiplap to every room in the house. I’ve already got an HGTV dream home… on the farm.
Here’s the funny thing: I don’t even watch a lot of HGTV. Truth be told, we don’t have cable at home — we’re a modern couple, and we went the way of the Roku a long time ago. There are, however, a few times a year that I find myself perhaps in a hotel for the night, visiting family at home or otherwise somehow able to access a television to while away a few hours… and somehow, every time, HGTV seems to be on.
Whether you’re watching House Hunters or Fixer Upper or one of the myriad other “dream home” series that give you the perfect arc of action in an hour or less, there are a few things that I’ve noticed make for the perfect home — whether they’re features already part of the place, or a DIY project you choose to add yourself. And I’ve also noticed that my barn possesses all of them already. Step aside, HGTV. We got this.
1. An open floor plan
This space just really flows, you know what I mean? Visual cues help separate the cross-tie area from tool storage, but at a moment’s notice we could open up the goat pens and use that space for additional wash stalls. That’s what’s so fun and flexible about this space — we’re really making the most of one room.
2. Dramatic lighting
We just redid the lighting in the barn’s center aisle so I’m actually really excited about this — it added a fun new modern update to this rustic space while still flooding the barn with warm, traditional light. (In all seriousness, these flat LED lights will save a ton on the electric bill, are virtually indestructible by overeager horse noggins and they don’t get hot — win win win for a barn setting.)
3. Huge yard
It doesn’t matter if you have one Chihuahua or eighteen kids — the house buyers on HGTV absolutely must have a huge yard that provides versatile space for wearing out said dog or offspring while also providing outdoor living and entertainment spaces with fancy things like a fire pit, outdoor kitchen, maybe some of those big-bulb carnival lights that are so trendy right now.
Feast your eyes on this giant yard. And yes, we do sometimes have campfires and sleep-outs in this versatile outdoor living space.
4. Walk-in closet
When we talk about our gorgeous and interior-lit walk-in tack room, my sister-in-law and I like to look at each other and giggle: I’ll say things like “oh, there’s plenty of room for my random bit collection in here!” to which she’ll respond “not if my goat feed goes in there first!” So cute.
5. Sliding barn doors
Sliding barn doors are HAVING a MOMENT, you guys. Everyone wants them for everything, from “discreet” bathroom doors to closet doors to random bedroom doors even though a conventional hinge door would actually be about 500 times easier, but who’s counting. As it turns out, my barn was fashion-forward this whole time, boasting not one but THREE sliding doors that only occasionally run off their sliders and drive me totally nuts.
6. Board and batten siding
Overshadowed only by its currently-sexier cousin shiplap, board and batten siding is JUST DARLING for when you want to add that rustic touch to your living room, guest room, random bathroom wall or heck — the whole house. While the front-facing sides to the barn were redone with metal siding more recently, the back sides are still the original board and batten painted in screaming “barn red” which makes our home style sense totally on point.
7. Your adorable hosts
For all of the above reasons plus this super-staged photo for a product review, my husband and I could totally be equestrian home style makers for HGTV. Just call us Chip and Joanna.