#TBT: Want to Freak Out Your Non-Horsey Relatives at the Dinner Table?
Go ahead. Fly your equestrian freak flag.
Use these 5 non-verbal retorts to prove once and for all that you’re not going to “grow out of the horse phase.”
Thanksgiving is upon us, which means another family holiday in which you’ll be surrounded by relatives who just don’t understand why the big dinner has to be scheduled around the barn’s feeding time (look, guys, the horses need to eat–you just eat more cheese and crackers and hang on for another hour or two.)
Fortunately, we’ve put together a list of perfectly passive-aggressive ways you can send them the message that you are a horse girl, you have always been a horse girl, and you will always be a horse girl, holidays be darned.
1. Leave the “I’m So Hungry I Could Eat a Horse” Spaghetti Measurer casually sitting out in the kitchen.
Spaghetti’s not really a traditional Thanksgiving dish, but maybe you can come up with a more creative use for it. (And for the rest of the year, you have a new absurd way to measure your pasta.)
2. Put it right out on the dinner table with some Pony Pasta or Horsin’ Around Pasta.
Skip the kitchen tools and go right for the food itself (the Horsin’ Around pasta even comes with a recipe for mac and cheese–does that count as a Thanksgiving side?)
3. Still not getting the hint? Try this horse-shaped cake pan and see if that gets their attention.
So what if it was designed for six-year-olds’ birthday parties? It can become part of your new holiday tradition. Try molding the mashed potatoes before you serve them. That’ll be subtle.
4. If dessert comes around and you’re still fielding awkward horse questions, serve up some Horse Manure.
There’s literally dozens of ways to do this on Pinterest, but the gist of it seems to be either chocolate no-bakes or rice cereal treats formed into little nuggets. Or you can go all-out and make this horribly impressive horse poop cake (and look, it includes spaghetti–so you can use your brand-new pasta measurer too.)
5. And if all else fails, just bring the horse right into the house.
Happy Thanksgiving and Go Riding!
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