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If Horses Wrote Personals Ads

Likes: Long walks on the beach, dogs, alfalfa cubes…

What would horses write in personals ads if they were looking for a new partner in crime? Here’s our best guess…

Missed connection?

You: a striking Appaloosa, sans rider, reins blowing in the wind at the showgrounds. “Loose horse!” they cried. You stopped by the trailer where I was tied, sniffed the air, and peed. Did we have a moment?

Will you gallop into my heart?

14 y/o Paint gelding seeks mare. Let’s spend our days ignoring each other over the haybale and our nights running free, evading the humans’ attempts to ride after work. Nothing can separate our love…and if it does, I’ll spend the entire time you’re gone walking the fence line and whinnying my head off like a little girl.

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Flickr: jdj150/CC

Let’s face my inner demons–together

I’ll say it up-front–I’m a little fearful of love (and ponies, and plastic bags, and men with beards), and I’ve been burned in the past (I think it was a plot by the voices I hear sometimes).  The world is a dangerous place, but I know we can face it together…and I need someone to hide behind if the plastic bags strike again.

Not my first time at the rodeo

I may put up a tough act out in public, but inside I’m just as sensitive as Totilas. I dream of a stocky Quarter Horse who can get the job done and give me a little nose nuzzle at the end of a long day. The buck stops here, my friend–unless you’re into that kind of thing.

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Wikimedia Commons: Thomas Damm/CC

Dressage Queen Seeks Prince

Looking for a stud who will progress through the levels with me and be my Pas de Deux partner. I don’t mind if you wear some tasteful bling.

Successful professional seeks serious relationship

I didn’t just graduate from Pony Club–I taught it for 10 years. Seeking a schoolmaster as serious about work as I am. Must be a good loader because I love to travel.

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