It’s like a scavenger hunt when you hang up your barn coat or take off your breeches at home — what did you accidentally bring back this time?
Barn coats. Butt pockets. They’re like black holes that suck things into their pockets or magnets for items that really should stay at the barn. No matter how careful you are about putting everything back in its place, I’m willing to bet that you’ve brought home at least one (or all) of these items at some point in your barn life:
1. Hoof picks.
Everywhere until you really, really need one, hoof picks always turn up in jacket pockets. I think it’s actually where they’re supposed to live. When riding for my college equestrian team with my then-boyfriend, our record at one time was 5 or 6 hoof picks that had wandered home to our apartment thanks to pockets. Sorry about that, barn.
2. Horse treats.
Once or twice is totally understandable–although if this happens on an almost-daily basis then you might need to get your horse’s sniffer checked out. (We won’t go into whether or not you’ve tried to eat a horse cookie yourself after finding one in your pocket on the hungry drive home.)
3. Pulling combs.
What is it about those metal pulling combs that draws them right into pockets? Is it their sleek, slender design? Is it the tiny weightlessness of them that means you won’t notice until it’s far too late? If there’s a horse in the barn that has its mane pulled, you can bet that you won’t be able to find the comb again because it’s sitting on my dresser at home after it turned up in my jeans. Sorry again.
4. Hay strings.
Baling twine is great to have around the barn for its myriad of additional uses (tying up buckets, hooking cross ties to the wall, quick fixes for missing blanket straps, etc.) At home…not so much. So it’s a good thing you’ve been stockpiling it all winter in your coat pocket. That’s real helpful.
5. Chicago screws/conchos/bridle ties/etc.
Assorted small-yet-crucial parts of tack: yes, they’re not hard enough to find on their own, so you should definitely stash it in your pocket, forget about it, and then bring it home with you later.
6. Crops and spurs.
Bonus points if you come home and the spurs are actually still on your feet. Crops slide easily into back pockets and remain there stealthily until you walk in your front door. Bring these home often enough and your significant other will start to get weird ideas, so be careful.
7. The “good” scissors/hay knife/leather punch/hose nozzle/etc.
What do you mean? ALL of our small tools work perfectly. Said no barn ever. We all know how this one works–there’s three or four of the same tool there to be used, but if you actually want to cut the strings on that bale/neatly trim your vet wrap/punch a new hole in your bridle without destroying it/whatever, you need the “good” one. And now no one can use it, because you just got home and found it sticking out of your coat pocket. Sorry, everyone…again.
Ah, well. I guess it’s true what they say:
What crazy things have you brought home from the barn, Horse Nation? Share ’em on our forums–we’ve even got a board called The Unstable Life. Don’t worry, we won’t judge.