Lost in Translation: Horse Classifieds Decoded
Seriously, what is going through people’s heads sometimes?
You guys seemed to like last week’s translations, so we’ve got an encore for you!
(Names have been removed, photos are not originals, and some ads have been altered to protect the guilty.)
Original ad: Romeo is a very quiet, sweet, kind, beautiful gaited carlomino. he is 3 and loves companionship. yes he is a stud the 2nd nut just dropped and he loves attention. he stays with my mares 24/7 and doesn’t bother anyone very dosile. you can put him with any horse and he is great. he’s a puppy with children and i personally have fallen asleep next to a campfire leaned up against his front legs. well we fell asleep together. once you come out to see him you can see for yourself. i had gotten secound place in racking cirlce h horse club in kingston springs this last summer. he is so great you are gonna get every penny’s worth outta him. he loads well, eats well, rides awsome alone and with a group. he’s a good trail follower. his gait is smooth and scoops your butt in the saddle. a real sweet man hence the name my lil romeo. he only has COG paper needing updating. very soft mouthed and rides with a pony split bit. he loves water and kisses. he was a rescue at one time twice removed and was very emaciated, his growth will be stunted because of mal nutrition when he was younger, his feet were very outta wack but all is fixed and is waiting for a good home. the reason why i’m selling is because we are downsizing the amount of horses so our pasture can grow and i need room for horses.
Translated ad: Romeo is a very quiet stud with a color so unique I made up my own name for it. He loves other horses, especially mares. Good brain, has not decided to kill me yet despite the strange situations I’ve put him in since I rescued him as a colt, or the fact that I was showing him under saddle at 2. Sadly, selling to reduce my herd. But who knows, maybe we’ll get some babies from those mares he’s turned out with to remember him by.
Original ad: Off the track 5 yo TB mare, still very very green. Advanced rider recommended. Sound UTD on everything. Only flaw is she has less than perfect feet, fine with front shoes. WTC auto changes, started over fences, hot temperament.
Looking for a quick sale. Asking $1000 to anyone willing to show up with a trailer and references and take her. If you need to try her/vet her/ ect ect she is $3000
It is very difficult for me to coordinate schedules with clients to sell her hence the incentive to just come get her. She will be no problem and a great horse for an experienced rider or pro
References required. Must be willing to send updates/keep in contact.
Translated ad: Shut up and give me your money. But then also promise to send references and occasional pictures so I can make sure my horse didn’t become a hamburger.
Original ad: 16h paint/TB 7 yo, and a Palomino quarter pony gelding. 8 yo. Both will need tuneup. Selling as pair $750, or $500 apiece. After this coming week they will be taken offline and they will be placed back online after tuneup. Great way to get flashy easy projects cheap. Possible trade for hay. Serious, motivated parties only. At this price, no test rides. (via SnarkyRider)
Translated ad: Two horses I’m willing to sell at a loss to just about anyone, so you can put the training on them, not me. I would do it, but you’ll have to pay for it. Otherwise, just come with your trailer and they’re yours, but no test rides in case you suddenly decide this is all a very bad idea.
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