Yvette Seger owns two toothbrushes: one she puts in her mouth, and one she doesn’t. Our fave “Tips for Eventers Living in Itty-Bitty Apartments in the City” columnist explains the difference.
Hey there, Eventing Nation! You’ll be happy to know that I made it through Inauguration Weekend with little more than slightly frozen toes and a general grumpiness towards tourists who couldn’t parallel park if their lives depended on it. Although I did seriously contemplate doing a “ride through” during the parade on my trusty stick horse, Cherry Pie (featured prominently in last summer’s “Insanity in the Middle” video), I figured the Secret Service wouldn’t quite see the humor of some chick running around in cross country attire and a helmet cam (they are not nearly as enlightened as EN readers). I know, I know…how selfish of me to not risk getting arrested for the sake of our sport!!
While I was failed to make inaugural history, I did manage to start packing for my upcoming excursion to Denver for the U.S. Pony Clubs Annual Meeting…and a little skiing afterwards. Like many Pony Club volunteers, I will be wearing several hats during the Annual Meeting, some serious (Council and Board Member) and some absurd (remember that rubber horsehead I wore when I dressed up as Rafalca for Halloween? Yeah, it’s in my suitcase). I will also be team-teaching a session on tack selection (I’ve got the credit card bills to show that I’m a freakin’ MASTER at spending money at the tack shop!) and care…in stilettos (Annual Meeting is the ONE TIME my Pony Club family gets to see me in something other than horrible paddock shoes…heck yeah, I’m gonna rock it out!). So if you’re in the Westminster, CO area this weekend, I promise it will be worth the Day Registration fee to watch me polish boots and clean tack in stilettos.
Anyway, as I hate to travel two-thirds of the way across the country only to discover that while I may have 20 strands of Mardi Gras beads and a helmet cam but nothing I actually need, like, say clothes, in my suitcase, I started making a list:
I have a feeling the TSA is going to have a field day with my suitcase…
True to Yvette form, my list is very stream of conscience – and you can tell by the order where my priorities lie. So I put the ski boots, helmet cam and rubber horse head ahead of an actual item of clothing…whatevs…that’s not the point. The important part of this list can be found in the two items circled in red…the toothbrushes. Yes, I’m one of those freaks who cleans her tack and boots with a toothbrush – sue me. I use a toothbrush to clean my half chaps and paddock shoes every morning. And like most civilized humans, I use a toothbrush two to three times a day to clean my teeth. Which leads me to this week’s tip:
Tip for Eventers Living in Itty-Bitty Apartments in the City #25:
No matter how itty-bitty your apartment may be, I strongly suggest that you keep at least 20 feet between your tack cleaning toothbrush and the toothbrush you actually use for your teeth. Just thinking about confusing the two makes me throw up a little…
And if you have a toothbrush for your horse’s teeth? In your itty-bitty apartment? You’re just weird and need help.