Your Turn: The chocolate clause
“How do you treat falling as something to be avoided but not something to be excessively feared?” Chelsea Alexander shares her own trainer’s deliciously foolproof method.
From Chelsea:
Riders are always going to fall off horses. When you start riding, it’s not a question of if you’ll fall off, but when. It’s an unavoidable part of the sport, and it’s something that has to be impressed upon new riders. But while falling is bound to happen, it is certainly not something that should be constantly feared. Gaining that healthy balance between respect for a horse’s power and confidence that you can handle whatever they throw at you can be difficult for any level rider, but with kids it can be even more difficult. How do you treat falling as something to be avoided but not something to be excessively feared?
My trainer long ago came up with a foolproof method for getting kids (and adults, too) in that correct frame of mind when it comes to falls. There is a rule at the barn that if you fall off, you owe her chocolate. It has come to a point where it’s almost a game—the pre-teens all joke that whenever she needs a cocoa fix she makes the lesson harder or has them drop their stirrups to get them to fall off. Even the little kids all know the rule—and it gives them something else to think about besides the surprise of falling off, as the first thing we often say to them (right after, ‘are you OK?’, of course, or ‘can you move your [insert body part here]’ in the case of a particularly nasty spill) is “Uh-oh, now you owe chocolate!” and my trainer will then go on and on, detailing what exact type of chocolate she would like. It often gets the kids to grin a bit, even through tears.
Every rider, from the seasoned veteran to the tiniest beginner knows about the chocolate clause, and even that mere fact keeps the fear of falling at bay. The beginners and younger kids know that it’s something that even the older riders have to deal with—they’ll see them bring in brownies one day, or be offered a slice of chocolate cake another time—and that knowledge being present and tangible (and taste-able!) seems to set them all at ease. It gives everyone something to laugh about, and it gives them something to avoid (making something chocolate or buying chocolate) but not something to fear (giving chocolate isn’t scary!). When riders at my barn bite the dust, my trainer bites into chocolate—but the taste is sweet for everyone.
- Send an email to wylie, the author of this post at wylie@horsenation.com











At the barn where I learned to ride when I was very young, if you fell off you brought brownies for everyone in your next lesson. It has a similar effect!
At the polo barn where I played/rode in college, BEER was supposed to be brought after a fall. Don’t worry, we didn’t drink and ride. A nice cold beer after a game sure seemed to make mucking stalls a lot more pleasant, though!!
For some reason this post made me crave a chocolate bar…. I totally went out and got one of those yummy Cadburry chocolate bars with the mixed nut and fruit inside of them.
And I haven’t ridden in two months… So there’s no falling off for me!!
I rode in a clinic once with an upper level event rider who I shall not name here who prefaced the clinic with, “if you fall off, you owe me a bottle of whiskey.”
Last year my mare Juno had surgery on her coffin bone, and my vet brought gourmet brownies one day when she was checking on her convalescence. She said the brownies served two purposes: if Juno’s recovery had run into problems we would console each other with chocolate, and if Juno was looking good we would celebrate with chocolate. Even now–with Juno back to work–when the vet visits for anything there is often chocolate involved.
My trainer’s rule is that anyone who falls off owes her a six pack of beer. When I bought my second horse, there was a very steep learning curve. Try as I might, my horse stopped at a jump and I didn’t at least once every other week. Not only did it give me a great sense of humor (you can only face plant so many times before you start thinking it’s hilarious), but now I know all my trainer’s favorite beers if I ever need to get on her good side. Plus those rough first few months are some of my fondest memories with my horse, who I miss dearly- sometimes your least glorious moments can be just as great as the successes.
The adults have to bring a bottle of wine, and the kids have to bring cookies. It’s a good incentive to stay on!
That’s a good turn. We make the parents of the kids buy them a Breyer! As an instructor, I like this method MUCH better.