Best of Craigslist: ‘I’m Scared’ Edition

We’d love to give some of these sellers the benefit of the doubt: maybe there was a little extra spirit in their Halloween this year. On the other hand, maybe it’s just ‘Best of Craigslist.’

Some of these photos will scare you in a funny way … others, not so much. Don’t worry, we’ll kick things off with one of the funny-scary ones, from Stacy: “Is this a Halloween-themed picture?”

Fancy is 4 year old paint mare, she’s a sweet girl that needs to go to someone who wants to finish her and make a great horse out of her she was very easy to start I’ve got about 12 rides on her she takes a bit nice and trailers nice doesn’t put up much of a fight for anything and is willing to learn just need someone to finish her off

This one is a little less fright but a little more brainteaser: which line is going to the bit, and which is going to the halter? (And for that matter, which of them is going to the other side of the bit?) From Leah:

We’re going to hope that this is a Halloween costume, and not even question how the photo is at all related to the item for sale, from Tamara:

,HEAVY DUTY HOT WALKER FOUR SPEED TRANNY $800.00 ,CONTACT WILLIS TRAINING STABLES AT
show contact info
has 9 inch ford rear end ,used lightlty COULDN’T BUILD IT FOR THE PRICE I’M ASKING,SOLD ALL MY RACE HORSES THIS IS A EXCELLENT BUY

And then there’s a whole different level of scary, from Bailey: “I dont know whats worse though – the photo, the grammar, or that the comments were people seriously interested in the horse. Nobody has even acknowledged the photo!”

Sometimes, the scary part is when the seller thinks the photo and the text are describing the same animal… from Emily:

Im selling this nice mare really calm real good for breeding asking for $3000 call me for me info 5 1/2 years old shes really friendly she can only use for breeding because her tendon is weak other then that she would make really good foals

It’s not all Halloween tricks and treats: this savvy seller is already looking forward to Christmas (and apparently riding the pony in the house, but who’s counting?) From Heather:

Little Joe is a mini ride stands 30 inches maybe more.
We ride him every where been to ForestVille and camped over night.
Any one can ride him. we have rode him dubbed and roped off him too.
Would make a great first time pony just in time for Christmas too.

Lots of shape. Much beauty. Very barrel. From Julie:

Coming two year old buckskin registered quarter horse stud colt
Lots of shape
Will be about 14’2 when done growing
Good to be around

Another installment in the “what’s going on with your bit?” series, from Cara:

This trailer might not scare you, but we’re pretty sure it’s going to terrify the poop out of your horse. From Jamie:

If the required kind of transaction for this horse doesn’t scare you, we don’t know what will — from Kaitlyn:

Mex Gelding Horse with paper’s 7 year’s old. Finished & Trained asking $6,600.00 CASH ONLY!! Pick up or delivery at a price. Must come to 506 foote avenue Apt,C Jamestown New York 14701 To confirm sale with Cash!! To Enquirer leave message with phone number to make an appointment BY TEXTING TO
show contact info
(Price has been reduced in half. must sell!)

And we’ll just leave this last good scare right here for you, from Jenni:

8 year old chestnut Jockey Club mare for sale. Never raced. Could never race. But you’ll race to dismount when she pulls her favorite cliff diving stunt.
Previous owner swears she recieved several months of training. We’re guessing it was by a fourth grade FFA dropout. Here she’s been started on trails. Started over ground poles. Started driving us crazy. Her balk and bolt make up for her non-existent buck and rear.
Ground ties with perfection. Only problem is once she sees you grab tack, she’ll keep herself ground tied till the cows come home. Pretty sure the only thing she’s consistent with is peeing torrents every 7 minutes.
Gets along with mares and geldings both large and small, but be prepared with blood stopper and Alu Sheild every time you go to catch the thin skinned masochist.
Just when you think you’ve fine tuned the art of grain and supplements to put some weight on her, you realize she actually volunteers her expensive feed to your fat Shetland pony. How else would she keep her bone thin frame?
If you think Horse is right for you, think again. If you still think so, shoot us an email. I guarantee she’s still available. Asking a negotiable rehoming fee to cover vet bills, broken fencing, wasted grain, and our ER visits: $9000.
On the plus side!!! She’s very soft and can hold up barefoot with mild work. Pretty face. Probably would tolerate hunters. Oh and she needs ankle boots.
My ONLY reason for rehoming is… I have decided I want to actually enjoy being alive.

Readers, if you run across an “interesting” ad in your Internet wanderings, send it our way! Email the link to [email protected]. Who knows – maybe you’ll help connect a horse with a safe, loving home. Go Riding.