(in)Famous Pony Behaviors

Ponies possess some “unique” behaviors. Lindsey Kahn illustrates a few of their most peculiar idiosyncrasies.

From Lindsey:

As a vertically-challenged equestrian, I’ve discovered that ponies still play a large role in my adult life. Some of my first childhood rides were on my cousins’ pony Copper, who tolerated our bouncing and primping with admirable aplomb. As a riding instructor, I now find myself riding some of my barn’s ponies who need exercise or a tune up, and I’m continually impressed by the spunky oomph and turbo-charged tenacity of these pint-sized critters.

Whether you love ’em or love to hate ’em, we all know some of the (in)famous behaviors of ponies.

1. Heck No, We Won’t Go!

Illustration by Lindsey Kahn

Illustration by Lindsey Kahn

Nothing can slam on the brakes quite like a pony who’s had enough. And when you go through your repertoire of everything you’ve learned in riding lessons – squeeze, kick, spank ’em with your reins or a crop, kick even harder – they just take it with the resolute stoicism of a nonviolent protestor.

2. The Pony Trot

Illustration by Lindsey Kahn

Illustration by Lindsey Kahn

Eventer Ralph Hill has referred to this way of going as “sewing machine legs” – the pony thrusts his muzzle toward the sky as his legs become churning pistons. It might cover lots of ground (eventually), but it’ll leave your teeth chattering and your, um, softer parts sore from all the jostling.

3. Little Man Syndrome

Illustration by Lindsey Kahn

Illustration by Lindsey Kahn

Have you ever seen a tiny dog attack larger dogs with the ferocity of a frenzied hornet? I’ve known several ponies who, despite their diminutive stature, will eagerly take on the big boys in the pasture as if to prove that they’re hot stuff. Whether or not the larger horses are intimidated or just humoring the ponies is debatable.

4. The Sneak Attack

Illustration by Lindsey Kahn

Illustration by Lindsey Kahn

Much like an ant hauling loads many times their size, ponies are known for their relative strength and agility. This definitely comes into play during what I like to call the “Sneak Attack,” when they suddenly and emphatically use their small but mighty muscles to a) bunch up into a tightly-coiled spring, and b) release all that potential energy into a single, powerful buck that really does the trick.

5. ConSumo Mode

Illustration by Lindsey Kahn

Illustration by Lindsey Kahn

There is an old arcade game called Bully, with a game-within-the-game aptly titled ConSumo. In this game, the sumo wrestler character must consume his way to victory, eating all of the good food in his path. Much like ConSumo, ponies often have insatiable appetites and the ability to continuously expand to shocking proportions. Their equine ConSumo Mode is a result of having been bred to withstand food scarcity and harsh conditions, and without careful monitoring of their food intake and exercise, these lovable stinkers can cheerfully eat their way into oblivion.

Know of any other (in)Famous horse or pony behaviors? Leave a comment! For more of Lindsey’s art and writing, check out her website or follow her on Facebook! Her art, including previous (in)Famous illustrations, are available for purchase on Etsy.

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